Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Living in the Rut of Comparison...Part 1


Every day we compare.  Sometimes the comparisons are healthy, but a lot of the time they are not.  We live in a culture of comparing.  Our culture breathes the idea that we need to better ourselves, climb the ladder of success, and try to “one up” someone else. Most people aren’t aware of how much we compare, because each comparison we have, we don’t share out loud, but they fill our mind.
“If she does it, then so should I.”
“Why does she have it all together and I don’t?”
“Why doesn’t she lose her patience?” “What’s wrong with me?”
“How does she have time to do all that and I don’t?”
“How can she afford that? I can’t.”
Whatever the comparison is, it can cause us to tear each other apart. We can often look at a person and draw up our own comparisons, conclusions, and judgements without knowing the full story. When we look at someone else’s life and compare, we are doing ourself and the other person a disservice. So why do we do it? Why do we compare and believe those comparisons? Because we have an enemy out there that wants us to believe his lies.  He wants to discourage us and make us feel that we are lousy, no-good-at-anything, and will never be as good as so and so.
When we compare, we take our eyes off of God and put them on our circumstances and the situations we are facing.  These comparisons can quickly lead us to feeling overwhelmed and insecure. Sometimes our insecurities will cause us to compare in the hopes that we will find something we are better at than another, in order to make us feel better about ourself.
That’s not the way God wants us to live. Each one of us, is uniquely different from the other. We might share some common qualities, but God has gifted each one of us differently and strategically. He didn’t make us all to be the same, rather each one of us is unique in their own way. When we compare we are taking away that person’s uniqueness.
Most women struggle with this comparison…“Why does she have it all together and I don’t?” I’ve heard ladies say it over and over. I’ve even said it too. We might even know that she probably doesn’t have it all together, but we fall into the trap of believing the lie anyway. We need to stop doing this! If I was to poll hundreds of ladies and ask them, “Do you have it all together?” Some would be honest right away and say no.  But others might say yes, because they are trying so hard to come across as if they have it all together.   But, if they were really honest with themselves, they would tell me story after story of what they are struggling with, issues they have, and where they feel they are failing.  Not one of us has it all together, including me.  So then, why do we tell ourselves this lie if we know it’s not true? Because we are insecure and not trusting God enough about who He has created us to be.
God has created each one of us with specific gifts and talents. We aren’t all going to be strong at the same thing. We also need to accept the fact that we are going to be weak in certain areas too. That doesn’t mean we don’t work on our weak areas and try to improve, but it might not come as easily or naturally as it does to others.
Over the years, it has been important for me to trust who God has made me to be and not wish I was someone else. When I trust that I’m uniquely His, made just the way He intended me to be, then I’ve freed myself from living in a rut of comparisons. Comparisons hinder us from our best, because it takes our eyes off of God and who He created us to be!
to be continued…

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